Crap, Man, It's Cold Here in Northshield! (a comical arrangement for a bardic creature with two heads)

By Salienor the Foolefeathre (with apologies to Master Ingus Moen)

CHORUS
Shuffling forth with a scarf on our face
To shield from the cold which can hit like a mace
Everyone's all huddled up in one place
'Cause CRAP MAN, it's cold here in Northshield!

HEAD ONE: Freeing my car from a near-inch of frost
HEAD TWO: Wondering just how much mileage we've lost
HEAD ONE: Getting snow chains and ignoring the cost
BOTH: Oh snowstorm the bane of my Northshield

and we're...

CHORUS

HEAD TWO: Donning my armor that's colder than ice
HEAD ONE: Freezing cold armor is not very nice
HEAD TWO: Skating a melee...
HEAD ONE: I'll not do that twice!

BOTH: The landscape is frozen Northshield

and we're...

CHORUS

HEAD ONE: Chapeaus and mantles are proudly displayed
HEAD TWO: Hey, look at all of this warm garb we have made!
HEAD ONE: Dealing in warmth is our stock and our trade
BOTH: Sweet fire the savior of Northshield

and we're...

CHORUS

HEAD TWO: Hugging and cuddling all through the storm
HEAD ONE: Closeness?
HEAD TWO: Hell no!
BOTH: We just want to be warm!
HEAD TWO: Sometime around Dub-dub new babes will be born
BOTH: We have to be close here in Northshield

and we're...

CHORUS

(slowly)

HEAD ONE: The Sun sudd'n'ly comes out in June or July
HEAD TWO: Dub-dub and Pennsic will quickly draw nigh
HEAD ONE: The Sun beats down on us,
HEAD TWO: we fear we my die...
(normal tempo)
BOTH: At least until next month in Northshield

and we're...

CHORUS

Published censoring the "Crap" in the December 2009 Nortwatch. Sarah the Fool's idea and chorus, we came up with the rest of it coming back from Border's Skermish. The nomme de plume  is taken from Sarah and Alienor + Fool and Grayfeathre. Two fools together may accomplish much.